Crotch-grabber still at large

Posted: April 10, 2010 in Headlines that make you want to punch somebody
Tags: , , , , , , ,

First reported by FOX

Didn’t click on it? I probably wouldn’t either, I’m not sure I can be trusted. To make a short story shorter, the police are on the lookout for a man accused of serial crotch grabbing. He lurks on the UCLA campus, waits for women to be distracted on their cell phones and pounces like a fat kid on the last ho-ho, accosting their crotchal region. It is reported that the mad clam spanker has gotten away with 6 walk-by fondles and is still on the loose.

Whatever happened to the “side-boob handshake” or the “slip-by ass graze”? They’re getting bold out there on the west side. Los Angeles police have obtained the following description of the suspect: Hispanic man, between 40 and 60 years old, with a dark complexion and a pot belly. Come to think of it, I haven’t heard from Carlos Mencia in a while…

My money's on Mencia

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    • Nick says:

      damn it, I should have known. You need to leave a trademark or something. Like after every grabbage you should yell out something inane, yet Hispanic. I’ll think of something, it’s a good thing I’m fluent in Spanish. El Bye-o!

  1. […] I mean… really? Considering what he was looking for, I bet he was pretty disappointed when he ended up here. […]

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